Remotely
The Distant Field Labs “Apparently” Thought-Provoking, Hard-Hitting, Overly Simplistic and Unnecessarily Blunt Attempt At Explaining The “Return to Office” Conflict.
Vanessa Piper, Principal Explorer
06 January 2025
If there is one thing I’ve discovered I absolutely cannot tolerate, it’s high levels of coriander in salads. Don’t get me wrong, it’s delicious and I want more of it, but it also makes my tongue feel weird, and I can’t stop eating it (while simultaneously feeling horrid) and questioning my life choices.
If I must mention a close second intolerance, it’s a tie between those apparently “thought-provoking” and “hard-hitting” LinkedIn arguments where people think they can “tell us like it is”, and the ongoing confusion as to why people don’t want to return to the office. Oh, and the word “Unprecedented”. It’s a three way split.
But the Return to Office debate just isn’t going anywhere.
We’ve tried convincing, we’ve tried collaborating, we’ve even tried CULTURE, and now we’re at the coercion stage of “get back here, or look elsewhere”.
It’s brutal, isn’t it? To offer so much, only to have the staff (many of whom are unable or unwilling to articulate WHY they don’t want to return) still dig their heels in.
Everyone’s had a go explaining it, so I might as well have a go too! After all, I’ve had a bit of time this year to dive into the philosophicals (it’s a word) and try to get to the cold and ungrateful heart of the problem, as succinctly as the word limit will allow.
Presenting…
The Distant Field Labs “Apparently” Thought-Provoking,
Hard-Hitting,
Overly Simplistic and
Unnecessarily Blunt Attempt At Explaining The “Return to Office” Conflict.
I should preface this by saying the article won’t actually be any of those things.
What we have is a bunch of research, several years of local and global information to draw from, and enough time on our hands to start to see the big picture. So let’s break down the issues, starting with the one we all want to ignore:
Your staff don’t trust you. And you don’t trust them.
2020: Work from Home, team!
Despite most businesses having a “thou shalt not work from home” policy (despite the technology to work remote becoming available in the early 2000s) the moment it became a matter of business survival, “thou shalt not” became “thou must” at the speed of light.
Armed with work laptops and remote sign-ins, staff were sent home, many at reduced wages over lockdowns, to work from home while teaching their kids, dealing with under-exercised dogs, or just feeling the walls close in around them.
It may sound petty, but the shift from “we have a great office in the CBD and if you’re not here in person, you’ll need to take a sick or annual leave day” to “work from home, now, until we say otherwise” is precisely the sort of “about face” that erodes trust just by being an elephant in the room; always present, never addressed.
Sounds like something that isn’t worth considering? Let’s put it this way.
The Towel Scenario*
Imagine you’re in a relationship with a wonderful person, who, for reasons of their own, has some weird rules; one of which is “you must ROLL towels, not fold them”. Okay, everyone’s got something, you think, and dutifully roll the blasted towels. Then you move to a new house, with more closet space, and they’re all “you have to fold the towels now, but in three sections, like this, with the folded edge here, because heaven forbid anyone looks into this closet and sees a towel edge!!!!”.
Suddenly you realise it’s not about the towels, it never has been, it’s just about control and what is easier and more preferable for your partner. Upon this realisation, you feel .. well, a bit hostile.
So add to that; it’s never brought up, never addressed, never apologised for and never explained.
*We can neither confirm nor deny the existence of any incident that may or may not relate to “The Towel Scenario”, and whether it occurred during, after, or at any time in the vicinity of the pandemic period.
The Push-Me-Pull-You Pandemic
If we had a timeline of the “go away, come back” since the COVID lockdowns, it would look a bit like the following.
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Widespread lockdowns create a need for remote work for many industries. Companies adjust surprisingly well, investing in remote technologies like Zoom & MS Teams, almost as if they’re the same tools that have been available for the last 5 years.
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Early: Surveys. So many surveys. Some actually highlight productivity gains from remote work, less commuter stress, and increased employee satisfaction. Others take a different stance, emphasising collaboration gaps, burnout and concerns about employee visibility.
Mid: Hybrid work becomes such a thing, many companies allowing greater flexibility and even using their hybrid and flexibility as a perk for new staff.
End: The big players have doubts, and announce phased returns to office - leaving room for employees to opt-out or delay if they have safety concerns.
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Early: The battle for workplace narrative continues, fighting for the hearts and minds of both companies and employees. It’s all innovation & retention vs loss of collaboration and drop in employee engagement.
Mid: Driven by Pandemic-Boom-Correction, Big tech and Finance start playing hardball, leading the charge for strict RTO policies.
End: The rising economic pressures start to change the conversation, driven by fears of a global recession, major layoffs in tech looming, etc. Many (most) employers take advantage of the economic uncertainty to justify stricter RTO mandates, citing “lack of visibility” and “need for greater team cohesion” - both of which are valid reasons, but often poorly communicated.
Still confused about those trust issues?
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Early: Productivity metrics become a common justification for RTO, with companies releasing reports claiming slightly higher outputs when staff can be actively monitored in offices, and concerns over remote workers’ engagement and loyalty.
Mid: Amazon and Disney implement strict hybrid models, many smaller companies follow suit. The message changes once more from optional flexibility to “business necessity”.
End: Employee resistance grows, unions and advocacy groups pushing back against the growing RTO mandates.
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After much contract-checking, lawyer conversations and union talks, hybrid work is the “compromise” model, with most companies enforcing mandatory in-office days, 2-3 days a week. And yet, no one is happy about it.
Return to Office (RTO) mandates remain highly divisive. Companies enforcing full time office work often struggle with recruitment and retention, while those with more flexibility face challenges with cohesion.
There are practical reasons for the RTO push back, which we’ll tackle shortly; but there is an emotional one too. “We would like employees back in the office for greater visibility” is shorthand for “we don’t trust that you’re working, if we can’t SEE you working”.
And that, right there, is the heart of the matter.
“He who does not trust enough will not be trusted.”
Our Hopes may be Sinking, but the Cost of Living keeps Rising
In an amazing effort to decrease fatalities as a pandemic swept the globe, many countries enforced significant lockdowns and incurred significant debt to do so. The legacy of COVID has been a global recession, and a cost of living crisis seemingly proportional to the restrictions imposed during the pandemic. Breaking down those factors:
Rising Cost of Living
While this is true globally, I will be a little bit specific to New Zealand here. Several aspects have played into how the cost of living has risen so very fast.We have a flourishing housing crisis, built over the last 20 years, but we saw dramatic house pricing increases during the pandemic. More recently, we’ve seen equally dramatic rates increases which have affected homeowners and renters alike.
To be able to afford housing, many workers now live further from city centres, which was made possible with remote work - but with return to office, commutes are both longer and costlier. Rising fuel prices and public transport fares have added considerable expenses for commuting workers. Parking costs in cities are just an insult to ongoing injury at this point, rising costs often being touted as if intentionally done for the righteous cause of making people rely on public transport, which remains as unreliable as ever.
Grocery prices have also risen steeply, with food inflation reaching record levels in 2023. This all adds up to less disposal income for commuting, or office-related expenses (like buying lunch).
Wage Stagnation and Pay Disparities
Despite our high cost of living, wage growth has lagged behind inflation.Many industries, particularly public services, implemented wage freezes during the pandemic, and for the years following. Add to that annual inflation rates peaking above 7% in 2022, outpacing wage growth to a huge degree.
Economic Pressures and Job Insecurity
Key sectors have had a succession of layoffs, with more on the way. Layoffs in tech, media, public service and other industries have created anxiety about job stability. Then we have the really ugly one…
Many organisations have used Return to Office mandates as a way to manage costs indirectly, such as reducing office space, or forcing out employees who are unwilling (or unable) to comply with stricter policies.I say “Unable” here quite intentionally, as due to rising costs of living, it has become untenable for some employees to return to office, once additional costs of transport, childcare, etc - are taken into account. They simply can’t afford to.
And I am going to point out here that there IS a perception that RTO policies disproportionately target parents, caregivers, or neurodivergent employees and this absolutely exacerbates the mistrust between workers and employers.
Post Pandemic Priorities
The pandemic caused quite a few workers to reevaluate their work-life balance and priorities. The benefits of time saved by NOT commuting was directed into family time, exercise, or personal projects and surprisingly not everyone wants to give that up.Some workers see flexibility as a fundamental part of job satisfaction, and returning to the office feels like a pretty big step back. They were trusted to be autonomous when it mattered for the business, and only mistrusted now that it no longer suits.
“I shall KEEP rolling the towels, thank you Ma’am.”
Office Culture Changed
When the restrictions were lifted and the expectation came forth that we trickle back to the office, several things happened.
Firstly, most managers returned.
Many had keenly felt the damage of lockdowns and isolation; most workplaces had no specific training for managers and leaders on “how to effectively lead a diverse and remote workforce” because no one ever thought they’d need to. This needs to be acknowledged, many leaders were making it all up as they went. There is a big difference between the two, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
The Remote Leadership Challenge
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We walk over to Gary’s desk when he gets back from lunch, and ask him if he has a few minutes free.
We sit with him; or step out to a meeting room, and let him know the deadlines on the “Pannik-Nao” RFP have been shifted to Friday 4pm, and this one might need some overtime to get across the board.
We ask if he has the bandwidth, or what we can take from him to get this one prioritised; also we make sure he knows he’ll get time in lieu to make up for this one, and we’re bloody sorry mate. -
A week later, we’re trying to get a 1v1 on Zoom with Gary for the same thing, trying not to look at his cats butt through his camera.
We don’t know what hours Gary is already putting in, how burned out he’s getting, what pressures he’s got at home, and we can’t even convince him of our actual sincerity and regret at giving him this added thing, or read his responses to understand how we can best get him support; knowing that everyone else on his team are also managing children, laundry piles, and their cats love-bombing them on team calls.
Needless to say, as soon as we were allowed to return to the office, the managers returned. This was a brilliant theory, except having had a taste of freedom, many staff did not return.
Some didn’t feel safe, after all they’d had 8 months of living in fear of COVID.
Others had adjusted to a work/life balance they’d never dreamed possible.
And some, unfortunately, just liked doing what they wanted without oversight.
“And lo, the Managers sat in shiny empty meeting rooms musing on EOFY targets, or in high cold offices asking questions on Zoom.”
But the Manager was not entirely alone, for another type also returned to the office, as promptly as they were able. The sales and marketing teams returned.
Starved at home, the sales team knows that networking is where they shine, and one cannot truly network from home. Their targets are the managers at other companies, so it didn’t really matter to them if the only people in town were managers and decision-makers, in fact this suited them fine. Long lunches, client coffees and Friday drinks returned with a vengeance.
The drought was over.
Manager dissatisfaction remained constant though, sure there was a small amount of life back in the office, but not nearly enough. How can you prove a team is working, or ascertain who is working harder than anyone else, if all you have is digital meetings?
More than that; how do you innovate, if you cannot collaborate?
“So .. many ... meetings”
And so it was that slowly but surely, the employees were requested to return to the office. At first, one day a week, but eventually three days a week became the norm for any hybrid workplace, with others just outright banning work from home.
What we found when we returned to the office, was more change.
A culture had grown in our absence, nurtured by those who raced back to network and be with other people.
Back before the pandemic, we could throw on headphones and work for hours uninterrupted.
We could go for a quick lunch and then get back into it.
We could do the work.
The office we returned to after the lockdowns ended was a different world. Here, people took endless remote meetings at their desks, and the meetings set during Work From Home days somehow still stayed in calendars.
Bob would be sitting beside you, chatting to Susan in Auckland, Mary in Christchurch, and Tom and Sally in Meeting Room 4; which Bob didn’t realise had been booked out and was in the same building, but hey - he was already set up so he might as well just take it from his desk and keep working while he did so.
In fact, everyone worked while taking endless meetings.
Getting up from your desk became a dangerous thing to do. Far from the nod in greeting you’d have had before, now the more outgoing office types would feel free to stop and chat for hours in the kitchens and stop by desks for extended chats. This was networking, this was everything denied to them that would never be denied again.
This was freedom!
But for those who need silence, focus and calm? There was no kindness or consideration for them.
This is what a company culture built by Managers and Sales & Marketing teams looks like.
Rebuilding Office Culture
As we have discussed, returning to the office doesn’t mean returning to the old ways, and if we’re forced to be really honest about this, we need to stop pretending it’s just a matter of “reverting” to 2019.
To summarise the issues we’ve covered so far, it looks a bit like this:
Times changed. Everything is a little bit broken.
Change is hard, and many people have change-fatigue.
Everything costs more now, and many staff are legitimately struggling and doing without the sort of lifestyles they took for granted before COVID, rising costs of living, and wage freezes/slow downs.
Everything you’re asking your staff to do is costing them both money and time in commute.
Their trust in you has been damaged.
- If you’re part of a company that asked your staff to work through lockdowns, often on reduced wages, while other people in the country appeared to get a 12 week paid holiday, please consider the loyalty they had back then, and how can you get that back.
- Many companies have added “need for increased visibility” as one of the main drivers for getting employees back in the office.
I’m not sure how this appears to you, but to your staff it reads “we don’t trust you, either”.
Office culture changed. There is very little respect for focus time, and most people are still taking as many meetings as they did when in lockdown. The environment is frequently loud, contrasting and chaotic; and those people who thrived at home are really struggling now.
So what do we do?
Obviously just my suggestions, but here’s the path I would recommend:
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Sure, it sounds easy, but we all know it takes consistency and time, and both parties need to be willing. I’d start by acknowledging past mistakes, owning up to inconsistencies during the pandemic - even if it means digging up old bones. Sometimes we need to re-break to heal clean, as much as we all would rather avoid anything unpleasant.
If this one could heal on its own, it would have healed already.
Be transparent, own past mistakes, and commit to finding new ways forward.
If you need to over-communicate to explain why RTO is important, do so.
We are humans, we thrive on connection, and we all collaborate and understand each other so much better when we can see and feel that the others are sincere. That means being there in person; at least some of the time. -
One of the best things to come out of the lockdowns was the possibility of hybrid work.
Which is great! But, even if you were amazingly excellent at working from home, there is no denying that some people did abuse it.
The conversation has to encompass that. So even if you worked solidly from home, please acknowledge the challenges that your leaders face, and acknowledge that you were a rarity.
Work from home needs to go from an ongoing argument, to an awesome perk of the job. That shouldn’t be a hard sell with so many companies now taking rigid and authoritative stances and demanding a return to office. If you’re a company saying “you know what, we trust you will get the work done, and we know you’re an integral part of our team, lets have Tuesdays and Thursdays in the office, and for the rest you’re welcome to work from home”, you will get your pick of interested and invested, loyal employees.
If you are an employer encouraging hybrid work, I would also advise you to:
Stop: make sure your team knows to stop working when their hours are done, loyalty often breeds extra work, which breeds burn out.
Collaborate: yep, work from home 2-3 days a week, and on those days we’ll expect you in the morning Teams meeting, and we’d love your full collaboration throughout the day. Because you’re awesome.
Listen: know what challenges your team has. Breed the sort of environment where they can tell you if they’re struggling, with time or financially. If they need to pick their kids up at 3pm, or if they would really like to only spend a day in the office each week because they’re struggling to pay for transport. Really hear them, and let them know you get it.
Times are hard. -
It’s about respect, not what sort of ‘vert you are.
Instead of making it about us vs them, offices can work towards designing and enforcing quiet zones for deep work, and collaborative spaces (away from those) for team activities.
Taking meetings and receiving phone calls at your desk in open plan offices should stop, they really only came about by a need to be absolutely available during WFH days and that isn’t applicable in the office.
In fact, let’s have a look at all those meetings.
So many of us created a barrage of meetings once we could no longer walk over to someone's desk, or we created them to have these touch points with different teams; with the best of intentions - to avoid silos, to keep talking. But we kept those meetings going once we got back into the office and now our meetings outnumber our meeting rooms. It’s a bit silly, but back to basics is good.
And please, recognise diverse needs. A modern organisation should be tailoring policies to accommodate parents, caregivers and neurodivergent employees - they bring a wealth of experience and perspective that you won’t find elsewhere. Fostering an inclusive environment is key to thriving as a business, and diversity shouldn’t be seen as problematic. -
Let’s take a quick moment to acknowledge the leaders, cast way out of their depth, that were charged with leading teams through lockdowns.
Because damn, that was hard.
Leaders should be equipped with tools for leading hybrid teams, from remote management training to emotional intelligence workshops.
And the concept of “visibility”, which has become the bane of everyone’s existence, needs to be put aside for once and for all.
It’s not about being seen to be available.
It’s not about being seen to be in the office.
As a business, it should be about measurable outcomes, productivity, and people who look forward to coming into work; because they love what they do, and they like the people they work with. So let's find a way to make that happen. -
It shouldn’t need to be said, but here goes.
We had several years being really scared. We worried about our parents, our children, our jobs, our health, and what sort of world we were going to return to.
We were told to put ourselves first, to listen to our fears, to operate in isolation in order to protect a civilisation. And we all did our best.
But somewhere along the way, we stopped thinking of each other as people and started seeing obstacles instead.
Employees staying home is an obstacle to team cohesion and collaboration, which in turn leads to increased value and marketplace dominance. Therefore Sue wanting to stay at home because her mother has cancer is the reason for lower profits this quarter.
Employers wanting us back in the office is an obstacle to our new sense of work/life balance and our ability to pay for anything. Therefore Matt, wanting us to come in 5 days a week, is responsible for us having to put the kids in before school care, and the dogs in doggy daycare, both of which shoots our costs up by $348 per week.
Then it became about feelings, about lack of trust, and voila - we are where we are. So have we considered just being decent to each other, and considering that perhaps (just perhaps) we all have equally relevant struggles that we try to not bring to work each day.
Final Thoughts
In an ideal world, we would have gone through the lockdowns, then charged back to work and everything would have been the way it was before.
We wouldn’t have to deal with rising costs of living, a global recession, and an entire generation of kids who had to walk back into a seriously disrupted school system.
But we did.
And we do.
The pandemic didn’t just disrupt where we work, it reshaped how we think about work.
To navigate the brave new post-COVID world with any actual chance of success, we need to think beyond the acrobatics required to simultaneously dig our heels in while doubling down, and instead consider how to make trust, flexibility and inclusivity the cornerstones of our workplaces.
It’s not about going back to how things were, rather it’s an opportunity to create something better - and that legitimately is worth getting excited about.
